“We are never going to be ready for going out alone, that moment never comes. And for five years if we start going out alone, that first time is going to be hard. Whether it’s going to be hard now or for five years, it’s the same!”
Back then when I told my wingman this, I knew I was close and that I won’t wait for too long before I start to go out alone. So, one Saturday my wing says he can’t go tonight, that’s few times in a row he’s saying that to me, and I started to feel angry. Not on him, of course, but on the situation that I’m in. I called few more people, and they are all busy. “What a bunch of betas,” I thought. I’m putting down my cell phone realizing how miserable I really am. My progress is literally depending on others. How bad is that?
I was an idol for that one friend when it comes to women, and now I’m acting like a little bitch. I slammed my fist on the table, got showered, got dressed and run out. Since then, whenever I didn’t have someone to go out with, I went to the clubs for 30 minutes, do my thing and then went back to bed. Priceless.
Since I have been going out alone a lot this year, I decided to write here few tips for you guys. Let’s do it.
Why going out alone?
Going out by yourself is the fastest and the best way to grow our social skills. Period.
Doing game without the wing after some time makes you very comfortable when you are with a girl, and that is necessary for your confidence.
You will learn a lot about yourself by going out alone, especially your fears and weaknesses.
Everyone who is good at the game had to go through solo nights, simply because it’s hard to find people that are committed to becoming better with girls. After some time I realized that going out alone is not an option but a need. Social freedom and confidence in having a good conversation with total strangers will get you laid. And those skills are improving by going out solo.
Of course, you have your friends, and you can go out with them when you want. But now you have a choice whenever some of them aren’t in “game mode.” When no one wants out, you can go by yourself to meet cute girls, instead of staying home eating your mommy’s cookies and poisoning your brain with porn.
This opens a whole new world of possibilities for you. That’s the beauty of going out alone. No one limits you. You can change location whenever you want, stay with a chick how much you need to close and basically do whatever you want. The point being is that you should go out and get through first few hard nights. After that, it will be easy. You would be able to go into an adventure whenever you want. This jump in your game is worth, and the prize is big.
Even when you want to travel around the world. There is no better thing than traveling around by yourself and getting laid along the way. A lot of people ask their friends to go with them to some country, and when friends reject them, they simply give up. They will never know what they have been missing.
SOLO VS TEAM
Let’s be honest, most of us will after some time of regularly going out with your crew say something like this:
My friends are betas, and they are only slowing me and cockblocking me with their behavior. And that is true. Deep down you know that your friends are cool for fun, but when it comes to seducing girls, 90% of them suck.
The crucial thing in the game is the ability to walk in a club/bar alone and walk out with a girl, which is what we all want. Being dependent on a wing is a double-edged sword, it is similar to feeling cool just because you’re dressing good or when you are familiar with the venue. But that isn’t how you progress fast.
Want to build core confidence and progress fast? Go out all by yourself, have a “bad” night several times in a row if you need, but don’t give up, go out again and again. It’s hard first few times, but there is no other way. Once you get used to going out alone, nights with your friends becomes ten times easier. A piece of cake. It will be just like lying home in bed and listening to music.
The fewer people you go out with, the fewer worries you have. You don’t have to worry if some of your friends will come to the girls, say something stupid that will drive them away and you don’t have to babysit them and watch for their feelings.
Actually, you don’t need anyone. Once you get success in solo nights, you will crash all your limits you though you have.
Starts going out in big clubs, where you won’t stand too much, avoid small bars at first. Most people would never do that, you already have my respect if you go out alone, no matter on what level you are. You have the courage to do what most of the guys never will.
You should feel already successful if you come to the club. Change your attitude from “Me vs. the night” to “Me & the night” and accept full responsibility for everything that’s going on. Be focused on the things around you.
Our brain is wired in a way that is stopping us from going in unknown places without the support. But we are no longer living in caves like 3000 years ago, we live in modern society, and no alpha is going to come and kill us. We should teach our brain to be freer, and take action. Start thinking that everyone in the club is your friend. Be social.
Ever wanted to go on boot camp? Going out solo is a solution for you, it’s the answer on how to build positive experience in a short period of time, not the boot camp. And you don’t have to pay to anyone.
You will learn to have more trust in yourself and understand that you are your own leader, without depending on someone else.
Going out solo is a key game changer, after some time you see so many things and beat so many fears. That feeling “I am enough” is just priceless. You quickly become confident, and your game is becoming better. Much faster than going out in groups. When you look back after one month of going out alone, all those questions and problem you have had with women and confidence will disappear, and look funny to you.
You will learn:
- To be social with everyone
- Getting into large groups easy.
- Take action without second thought.
- Treat everyone around you as friends.
- Trust yourself.
- Stay with girls longer than you expected.
- Strengthen your “I don’t give a fuck” mindset.
- Become relaxed in clubs/bars.
Don’t worry if you suck first two times. You will be surprised what you are capable of doing when you put yourself on that kind of pressure.
Don’t forget to always congratulate yourself on going out. If you go out, you already won. Relax and enjoy.
“WHY ARE YOU ALONE” QUESTION
Some guys are afraid of this question, and that’s stupid!
When you are out and talking with someone, no one is going to think you are alone. You don’t need to explain to others why you are alone. Say what you want, it doesn’t matter. For example:
-My friends are gone, they are tired. It’s so good in here.
-I’m alone like Pinocchio.
-I’m alone in this world.
-No, I’m with you, crazy.
-My friends are late.
-I’m with them (and you show some random guys)
-I’m an arsehole, I don’t have friends.
But most of the time people will think that you are with the girl you talk. Even better.
This is your ticket to the bigger league. I know you want to play in the first division.
If you pay the prize by getting the courage to go out alone, the universe will recognize and reward that. There is no fail, only results that you can learn from.
Everyone that is really good at this had some period of time when he went out alone. Become one of them, don’t depend on others.
So, what do you want to do? Have a great night or sit home? Your choice.
Good times are waiting for you. At least for now.